New Year's Resolution

Today being the first Monday & the first working day of the year 2010, here are my resolutions for this year:

• Exercise more & develop healthier eating habits. Seriously, my weight is creepin up and entering a new decade certainly didn't boost my metabolism.. I'm ALMOST the same weight I was when I was preggo!
  
• Spend less. I HAVE to stop buying on impulse. Maybe spending less time in malls will help :p
  
• Learn to sew. A new-ish goal (compared to the previous two, which I've had since a couple years back), which will help in several ways: help me develop a new hobby & channel my creativity, help curb my spending (in line with reso #2).
  
• Work more effectively. I frequently procrastinate at work by trawling the net (which is kinda what I'm doing right now..), and then have to work overtime or bring work home.. which is NOT fun and seriously damages my sense of achievement for the day, which is rather depressing.
  

Still lots more I'd like to achieve this year, but I think I'll keep it short and simple somewhat, so it'll seem less burdensome.

Okay, time to get back to work again. *shutting down my firefox window*...

Happy Holidays, Folks!

I'm never good at remembering occasions, much less to remember sending out the relevant greetings and well-wishes.
So, before I go on, I'd like to wish everyone a belated merry christmas, happy holidays, and all that.

...Just remembered... I forgot to send out a holiday card to my best friend.. The holidays mean a lot to her and I know, and that makes me a pretty crappy friend... :(

So sorry... will call after this...

It's Official

The office banned facebook (along with the numerous games I used to waste time during slow--and sometimes not-so-slow--office hours), so there goes one method of procrastination.

I "HAVE" to start blogging again.


So, here goes...... welcome to the boring life of me...

A critique from a certain gentleman

I don't understand why some ppl just *HAVE* to comment on others--what they're wearing, what they bought, what they ate, their BODY SIZE even!!

As if they are the most perfect human being to ever exist.

Today this guy (well I couldn't very well mention his name or position as my friends from work would easily guess.. but he's kinda indirectly my boss) came over to chat with my boss, whose desk is just across from mine. Then he *LOUDLY* commented on how I've grown BIGGER AND BIGGER over the years. Admittedly, it's true enough--I haven't exactly shed pounds post-baby--but still...

I usually don't take offence on others' wicked comments, but, this guy then proceeded to approach me while saying, "yeah, she's gotten bigger and bigger, just look at her arm, excuse me, " and grabbed my arm, pinching the 'flab', exclaiming, "look her arm is even bigger than mine!"

He frequently comments in public--in front of all my workmates--on my "huge proportions" and even jokingly (??) indicates he's disgusted!

Now, I wish he'd read this (okay, I'm too polite to say it out loud to him, as much as I want to, not the type to cause a scene--which is very possible with him..):

1. You're old, balding, impolite, arrogant, and I wouldn't want to be associated with you if I had the choice, so what gives you the right to diss me? If it was really meant to be a joke/positive critique to get me to get into shape, then there's no need whatsoever to do it so publicly, and so frequently!
   
2. Your very own beloved offspring is severely overweight, so why don't you pick on him instead (or is he a constant victim at home, I wonder? Hate to imagine his day-to-day..)
   
3. You act like you're so suave, so kind and wise, so dandy. But, actually, you have the worst fashion sense in this whole floor, and quite possibly in the whole office!
   
4. You chastize ppl for being impolite. And how've you been doing yourself? Quite the role model, huh?
   
5. If I were to speak up, there'd be a gazillion things to humiliate you about, including physical stature and weight, so you better take a good look at the mirror, buddy! (but I stand corrected, of course you have thousands of mirrors for you LIKE looking at yourself huh? Well, someday soon the Adonis illusion is gonna wear out and you're gonna see yourself for what you really are and go into shock, I tell ya!)

As a final thought, I just want to shout out a quote from a certain Indonesian celebrity with questionable English language proficiency (but claims otherwise):
"WHO DO YOU THINK HE ARE????!!!"

Stereotyping?

A total stranger looked me up head to toe, then remarked, "So, you're a secretary or something like that, eh?" and waited for my answer. I was non-responsive and the stranger walked away with an air of hey-I-was-spot-on! about him.

His remark offended me in a way. It's not that I have anything against secretaries, but it's the typified association of a person's clothing with a certain profession. How simplistic! Hmph..

A day in the office

This conversation happened not too long ago, between me and an acquaintance.

(upon being ushered away from a lunch table to make room for "the wives club" (an organization of officials' spouses in my office)):

• me (in a rather loud, annoyed voice): I don't understand why there needs to be such an organization for the wives, what's it good for anyway?
• acquaintance: Shh, not too loud they might hear you.
• me: So what? (wanted to say "so f****in what??" but I don't swear in the company of office folk...only in familiar company do I "let myself go") Let them hear me, I don't care.
• acq: But you'll get in trouble.
• me: What can they do? If they think bad of me so be it.
• acq: I don't mean it like that. What I meant was, you'd get mad too if someone bad-mouthed our organization. (note the emphasis on "our organization"... did he mean the office?? Seriously?? Oh, I couldn't care less!)
• me: So what if someone thought "our organization" sucks, I don't care. Let them say what they want, people are entitled to different opinions.
• acq: Well, it's up to you, I'm just trying to warn you nicely, but it's up to you. It's a positive organization, aimed as a positive activity for the wives who are mostly housewives with little to do. (with a super-patronizing look plastered on his face)
• me: (speechless, as I get when baffled by others' behaviour/way of thinking...) (Huh??!!) ...Well.. Okay... but suppose there's an organization like this, but for husbands. Would you join it?
• acq: No, I wouldn't. Because as a man my main duty is to provide for my family.
• me: (even more stumped, and decide to leave the table)

Trying to think positively, I convince myself that he meant well in warning me, that he was worried that my ass would be on the line if they dislike my opinion and decide to rat on me to their husbands (i.e my superiors).

But my simple mind decides to think: What a typical chauvinistic ass-kissing prick!!!!!

Things that Make Me Want to Get the Hell Outta Here!!!

I'm so tired of this so-called office I'm stuck in.... I've wanted to quit since 2 years ago but things just seem to come up all the time I've mustered the courage--hold on, not the courage to say "I quit" to the boss, but the courage to conquer my over-bearing conscience & dumb quasi-patriotic ambition to "do my part" for my country. Also, I'm always stumped waiting for the "right moment". It never seems to come, and when it does, there's always something that keeps me from quitting. :/

Well, some things encourage me even more to soldier on, but some other things succeeded in dampening my mood.
This is my effort to sort things out, in my attempt to determine whether to quit this job....

Good things:
1. I actually like this job better than other jobs I've tried, and I feel that I'm pretty good at this
2. The person in charge of my unit. She's smart, kind, caring & bold. Although her sharp tongue can hurt your feelings, it's just her way and if you get to know her you'd understand. Ppl hate her because she's strict but I respect her for it.
3. There are some really decent ppl here, and they've shown me kind attention these past 3 years.
4. The ppl I get to meet because of this job. Some great personalities and friends I found because of this job.

Ugly aspects:
1. The corruption
2. The corruption
3. The corruption
4. (Blind) nepotism. I'm not against relatives helping each other to get a job, provided they'll be good at it, and earn it, and are better than others competing for the same job. But the examples here are APALLING!!!
5. Getting certain positions because they're related or close to someone in higher positions. Still in connection with the one above, but this is worse, because these types are usually only good at ass-kissing and snatching opportunities.
6. The person who was previously head of my unit (wont tell which unit, because it's not fair, this is just my own opinion and dislikes). Pessimist and compliant to the boss' wishes, and at some occasions accused me of not "working hard enough" when I've sacrificed quite a lot for this job. (including a vast portion of my social life & time with my family)
7. The ass-kissers (included and not included in #5)
8. Missing the opportunity to be with my baby boy. I wasn't the one who saw him lean over and grab his feet for the first time, and I might also miss other golden moments. If only I can take time off for a couple of years, or work from home.....
9. The distance between my house and the office. Not a prob before, but now it's different.
10. Some ppl at work who just seem to get on my nerve!!!!



So... what does that give me? 4 reasons to stay and... 10 reasons to quit (even if numbers 2 & 3 don't count, there'd still be 8, and I can think of some more, heh heh).
I'll just wait till the right moment comes, maybe in a couple of months time...
Hopefully, I'll have a darn good reason for quitting by then.